To keep a lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it.
Mother Teresa

Here in the Mid-West, Indianapolis to be exact, we are going through a deep freeze. I woke up this morning to 2 inches of ice and wind gust of up to 50 miles an hour! Crazy stuff with trees and power lines falling down.

You know what is really crazy? That’s how I feel spiritually right know. Before my feet hit the floor this morning, i spent some time with the Lord and I asked Him to forgive me for my sins and give me back the deep emotion that comes from loving Him. If the feeling I have is a feeling of familiarity or complacency, I don’t want it. I never for one minute want to take for granted His love, but lately it feels like i have.

So what has changed? I’m doing all the same things to be close to Him. I’m active in my Church and prayer life, as well as alms giving and ministering to those in need. But as much as I don’t want to admit it, without the emotion, I am just going through the motions of loving Him.

Kinda like I do with my family sometimes, another thing I don’t want to admit. And though I put myself there sometimes, they (HE) still loves me.

I can’t help but think of Mother Teresa, who went through a 50 year period which she calls a dark night of the soul. St Francis also experienced this as it is said he felt unworthy of God grace. And lets not forget Job, wow! Talk about a dark night of the soul! Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not even in the same ballpark as these souls, not even the parking lot of the ballpark! But it does give me some reassurence to know that dark nights happen sometimes.

What are we to learn from being away from Him?

Could God be testing me?
Is He testing my faith?
When the freeze comes will I fall like the mighty trees and power lines?
They look so strong.
Or will I bend like the willow and find shelter like the birds?
They look so fragile… I feel so fragile.
I guess I was a little to comfortable in that peace He was giving me:)
Psalms 27:13-14
I remain confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.
Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.

When I climb down the mountain
and get back to my life
I won’t settle for ordinary things

Third Day