parenting – Tru Original

Category: parenting

The Day of Forgiveness

My Dad and Daughter

As a little girl I was never close with my earthly Father. My parents divorced when I was 2 and i simply didn’t know the man I called Dad. Unfortunately I spent many years bound in resentment and bitterness over this. I felt unloveable and my bad choices through my teens and early twenties just added fuel to that fire. I blamed way too much on a man who I believe today did the best he could to love me. Today holds a dear place in my heart for so many reasons, it marks the one year anniversary of the day I forgave my Dad. Sitting in church a year ago today, God’s mercy washed over my heart and He gave me His eyes to see my Dad as He does and here’s how i see my Dad today…

generous, funny, down to earth, a great cook, wonderful smile, creative, broken, hurting, and loves me and my family so dearly.

Last week I recieved a letter from my Dad saying all the words I had wished for so long he would say to me, almost a year to the date of my forgiving him. The amazing thing about that letter is I didn’t feel how I thought I would feel about recieving it. I thought it would make me feel some how justified in my pain for all those years, kinda like I deserved to feel like that…bitter and angry. But it didn’t make me feel deserving at all, it made me feel just the opposite, it made me feel unworthy of God’s mercy and it made me feel sad for my Dad not having a friendship with Jesus. God calls us all to be OAKS OF RIGHTOUSNESS, A SPLENDER FOR HIS GLORY and I knew in my unforgiveness i had not been that for God. He asks us to forgive our enemies and here I held onto unforgiveness like a security blanket.

As I sat in church today, filled with gratitude, all I could think of was my Dad and just how much God loves us all. I thought about how God has filled me up so completely that, in Him, I have been made new and His mercy gives me beauty for my ashes. And I thought about God’s generosity to me, giving me my Husband, my Priest, and my Father in Law. I no longer have an absent dad…I have FIVE FATHERS! God is Good!

My Husband, my Best Friend

The man who taught me love, patience, and trust. You are my Heaven on Earth! I admire, respect, and adore you and the kind Father you are to our babies. I have learned so much from you, love of my life. xo

I’m always amazed at what comes out of me on this little blog of mine. I never mean to go deep yet somehow I always end up here. My prayer for you, if you are holding onto unforgivness in any way, is that you would lay it at the feet of Jesus. That He would do for you what He did for me…. give you His eyes so that you could see your enemy that way God does….broken.

“Unforgiveness takes delight in our fear, as it binds our wings and pushes us off the cliff of dispair.”

Come back this week to play “Guess Where”, my silly version of Where’s Waldo and win a fun prize:)

Linking up with Jen and my sisters at http://findingheaventoday.blogspot.com/, stop on over.

Day 17 of Lent…My Baby’s Birthday!

Prayers and Scripture for Lent

The Annunciation of the Lord

Day 17

And Mary said,

“Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord; let it be done according to your Word”,

and the angel departed from her.

Luke 1:38

________________________

Lord; our Father,

On this Holy day of Your Annunciation, when Gabriel came to the Virgin Mary, let us give you praise. You chose the lowly Virgin to bare your Son Jesus and she did so with complete TRUST. Never once did Mary doubt You, though she must have been scared. Help us to TRUST you like Your Mother did!

Help us to look into the hurt faces of our world and the hurt places in our heart and TRUST You with it.

Your yoke is easy, burden light…let us sit in that promise with complete TRUST.

In the name of our Savior,

Amen

***

HAPPY 10th BIRTHDAY COOPER

Cooper

Bright light and big surprise

Leader

Wise

Kind and caring…even in the little ways

Gentle

Brave

Sensitive and Empathetic

Adventuresome

Clever and hysterical

My Baby!

When you came into our lives 10 years ago, you were a surprise and I can’t say i was fully equipped to deal with a new baby and a 14 month old.
I was a mess.
But, God knew you already and how much our family needed you. Needed your loyal faithfulness and gentle leadership. You humor and wit.
You completed us.
I am so proud to be your mommy and I truly admire you.
I love you!
Mom
xoxoxox

My Sweet Girl is 11!

My Little Baby is 11 years old…..

LAUREN

Caring heart

big goof ball

intelligent

stubborn

artistic and creative

‘look at me, look at me’

sensitive

God loving

strong willed

On the day you were born, your Dad and I could have never prepared our hearts for the love and joy you would bring into our lives. Our sweet gift from God, always treasured, always loved, always…..

DRIVING US UP THE WALL!!

***************************

I’ve missed visiting with you all these last few weeks. Life had other plan for me. I did the best I could and now I get to take a breather and rest in Him.

My prayer for you my friend is that when you grow weary, you will rest in Him. You don’t have to fall, you can just stop and rest. And if you do fall, I hope you will look to the Son as He carried the cross. He fell many times and was helped back up by others. He even allowed someone else (Simon) to carry the cross for awhile. Even HE couldn’t do it on His own.

PRAYER

Heavenly Father, whose most dear Son, as He walked the way of the Cross, accepted the service of Simon of Cyrene to carry his physical burden for him: mercifully grant unto each of us the grace that we may gladly bear one another’s burdens, for the love of him who said, “In as much as ye have done it unto the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me,” even the same thy Son Jesus Christ our Lord, who now liveth and reigneth with thee and the Holy Ghost, one God, now and for ever.

Amen

Back to School and randomness

Summer 2005

Summer 2010

Today my kids went back to school. This is a new school for them so we all had mixed emotions but mostly we were excited. I was more excited on the way to school thinking, awww my days are mine again! I can get organized, set some goals, lunch with girlfriends, go to the gym, get more time in the studio, begin a new bible study, keep my house clean, etc…those with little ones know this list well.

I walked them to their new classrooms and as all the kids stared at the new kids, it hit me.

They are growing up and becoming their own little people. Now if you know my kids you are probably asking, ‘really jill, you’re just figuring that out?’ My kids are very independent and we raised them that way. But YES, I’m just realizing that every year I have to let them go a little more, a little further, for a little longer. That reality is setting in. I know the day will soon come when they won’t want to hang around with their old mom and dad anymore and they will pick their friends to share thoughts and feeling with.

So today we moved down the road called life and I watched my babies (ok they are in 4th and 5th grade, but they are MY BABIES!) be brave and grow. I was so blessed to see this side of them and very grateful to be their mom. I wondered all day how they were doing so seeing the smiles on their faces as i picked them up was a precious moment of relief.

How do (or did) you feel when your kids go back to school? I would love to hear your story.

On a totally different note…

It is the season finale tonight of the NEXT GREAT ARTIST on BRAVO. I really enjoyed this show and I’m gonna miss my Wednesday night date with the tube. Is anyone else watching?? Who do you think will win? I vote for Abdee but I think it will be Miles. Can’t wait to watch!!!!

Lastly I wanted to invite you to be a guest on my DARE TO LOVE MONDAY posts. I always try and choose someone who follows my blog and who inspires me to grow. Your blogs do that for me so consider this an open invitation. I really feel like our blogs are a community so if you follow me, I follow you. I want to know and support those that know and support me, simple as that. So if you are interested in a visit, leave a comment or contact me directly. I really do love Mondays because i get to know you more.

Talk to you on Friday.

seek and find

Seek and Find 11×14

Luke 11:9-10 (New International Version)
9″So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 10For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

Quick story…

My kids just finished 4-H, a huge organization that fosters leadership skill and training in everything from animal care to Lego’s. It’s such an amazing club and the kids wanted to do DOG OBEDIENCE, with it being Lauren’s second year and Cooper’s 1 year.

Lauren chose to work with Bob, our 11yr.old blind poodle. Coop chose to work with Krissy our 6 yr old Pomeranian. I say ‘chose’, but the better wording would be ‘stuck with’ because ideally you would never chose a blind old man and a stubborn, prissy pom! But that’s what we had to work with and at first the kids were very excited. Then the reality hit…4-H is hard work and even more of a challenge when working with 2 stubborn dogs.

As the big day approached, the kids started to get more discouraged and asked me many times if they could just give up, fearing they would be humiliated. Knowing they hadn’t practiced and trained like they should have I told them no, we will finish this. This was simply one of those times I had to let them fail.

The day of the show we’re driving over and Cooper is just miserable and I asked him what was wrong. “I’m just so mad because I know Krissy won’t listen to me”. I try and reassure him but could see he was nervous and frankly i could feel his pain. The kids go through their run with the dogs and judges and we wait for the big moment when they call the kids up for scores and ribbons. You could feel the tension throughout the whole arena.

Cooper’s group gets called up first…

Awww, the relief that only a BLUE RIBBON could bring!

Lauren’s next….

2 BLUE RIBBONS!!

On the way home the kids were thrilled and so proud of the dogs. Out of my son’s mouth comes this little song of Luke 11:9-10. I don’t know in which moment I was more happy, seeing them hold those ribbons or hearing my youngest quote scripture, giving the glory to God. What Cooper didn’t know was that the night before I was up late reworking an old piece i just didn’t like. I regessoed (is that a word?) over it and began to rework it.

This was the final result.

Isn’t God the coolest?!

We all scream for ice cream!

Yummy…..

My sweet son Cooper , 9 yrs old, has a ton of ideas of what he wants to do this summer. I mean a TON!! Trying to keep up with the kids and their friends this summer has been a real challenge. You think that the older they get the less they’ll need or want, is an illusion. I think God just tries to prepare you for each step the best He can. I am definitely struggling with balance this summer and it is starting to take a toll. I just keep reminding myself in a few more years they won’t even want their old mom around and it gives me the push i need to go the extra mile.

Anyway…..enough of that.

My son is the prince of whatever’s left since he has an older sister to contend with. He asked me for just one thing one recent weekend. “Mom, I want just one thing this weekend and that’s to make homemade Banana Mango ice cream” Oh is that all i thought, but my mouth said “I promise”. So Sunday night rolls around and I was running out of time to keep that promise but I gathered all the supplies needed, determined to keep my word, no matter how tired I was.

Lazy Mom’s Basic Vanilla Ice Cream recipe (no cook!)

-An electric ice cream maker (thank you Nana Di for all the cool things you find at yard sales)

-4 eggs

-1 cup of sugar

-2 tablespoons vanilla

-1/2 pint of whipping cream

-2 cans of Eagle Brand condensed milk

-1 1/2 quarts of dairy milk

-1/4 teaspoon of salt

-any fruit or flavor you want to add to taste (we used 3 mangos and 1 banana cooked down in a sauce pan to marry the flavors)

-Ice cream salt rocks

-lots of ice!

First you follow the directions on your ice cream maker, preparing the ice and salt in the mixer by layering it.

In a big bowl combine eggs, cream, sugar, salt and vanilla and mix thoroughly with a mixer. Pour in any fruit and the condensed milk and stir well, add dairy milk and stir well again.

Add mixture to the fill line in your electric ice cream maker can.

Follow the directions on your maker regarding time, but it took about 30 minutes of mixing on mine to get the consistency we wanted.

Remove the electric mixer out of the can and lick the blades. Kids loved this!

Then remove the can , wrap in towel, and place in the freezer for around 30 min.

Remove from freezer and enjoy.

The ice cream was so delicious, but the best part was hearing my precious son say

“Mom, this is the best ice cream I’ve ever had!”

tick tock, tick tock

Where does the time go? The kids have been out of school for exactly 7 days and I have to admit I’m struggling! The house is a mess, haven’t had my daily hour of power (time with Christ), no workouts, no new blog posts or shop/website updates, no time for ME!! Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE MY KIDS and spending time with my family is my greatest joy….but I will not be the best me without a few of these daily rituals and they will not be the best them without some structure and routine.

On a more positive note, I have been blessed to sneak in some girlfriend time(so it is thanks to them i have not completely lost it), walk and bathe the dogs, talk to my dad on his birthday, camping with the family over the holiday, log onto the new e-course I’m taking with Kelly Rae (so good, check her out http://kellyraeroberts.blogspot.com/) 1 hour catching up on laundry and spent a few late nights in my studio. But I don’t think I have sat down with my wonderful husband all week!

To do list for tomorrow…..
~Sit down with my wonderful husband and tell him just how wonderful he is
~Get in the WORD
~create a summer schedule
~Workout
~walk dogs
~clean the house
~plant new flowers
~catch up on paper work and emails
~clean the turtle tank

and if i have anything left after that…play with my kids!
They are probably sick of me by now though.

Ok, I’m done.
Thanks for listening and letting me vent.

mom and daughter weekend

I just love this picture!! Obviously it’s not me and it’s not my beautiful daughter, but can you just see the love? They are even looking into each others eyes, just soaking each other up!

I had a wonderful weekend, just mom and daughter. We spent time just visiting with each other, girl’s night out with friends, church, and even went to an art fair. My daughter is 10 years old and she is so amazing. We don’t always see eye to eye, but there is no doubt that she is the apple of my eye.

My husband and 9 year old son went on a father & son camping trip and it’s safe to say they didn’t miss our girl drama a bit!

We rarely get one on one time with the kids, this is something we are working on. We are trying to spend a half hour, twice a week, with each kid. We are even scheduling it into our week. How sad that we have to actually schedule it!! We do a good job with family time, but there is nothing like one on one time and the kids just eat this up. How nice to not have to share mom and dad, how nice to just soak each other up!

Mother’s Day!

They start off so innocent, needing so much. You feel like you’re giving every part of yourself away, but love every minute of it.

I’ve been watching these 3 little robins in a nest on the side of my house since their mother came 2 months ago. A robin has come to this very same nest for the last 3 years. She fixes it up a little, adds and fluffs and it grows more every year. Last night was a terrible storm with very bad wind and I worried all night about these 3 little babies. Telling my family “I’m really worried about the birds” over and over. My husband says after the 5th time, in a rather bored with the subject voice, “they’re birds, they will be fine”. My son ” Mom, what are YOU gonna do, teach them to fly?” Maybe!!! This morning I go to the nest to check on them…

Down to one, ready to leave the nest. Of course then I start to fret about the other 2, check the yard and staring out all the windows. My family is so over the bird thing by now and growing more bored by the second. Finally i spot the other babies, just fine, learning to spread their wings.

Learning to spread your wings and leaving the nest…how that can be so hard. I think all moms of every kind have trouble with this .

That’s who you become MOM! And you love every minute of it. Even as they try and turn away, be on their own, become independent, you watch and you love, the grip gets loser and it’s so bittersweet as they walk , fly away.

Because as Moms we all want the same thing for our babies and that’s to have, know, and love more than we did. And the only way they will find their way is if we let them go, one day hoping that you’ll find them again…on top of the world!

My husband and i had a especially hard time being MOMMY and DADDY this week, as we faced some issues and concerns with one of my children. Being a parent is never easy and if it is you probably aren’t doing it right. All through the week we clung to each other, friends and to God, waiting for some relief and for the struggle to end. But it didn’t and it hasn’t and it won’t.

For MOMs everywhere, this post is for you. Praise God for the gift of our babies. May you one day find them in the palm of His hands, on top of the world!

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!